Harry and Meghan, a lesson for us all

My husband started talking to me about Harry and Meghan while I was in the shower this morning, which is unusual because aside from the time he accused me of being a worse driver than Prince Philip, we never talk about the royal family.

“My mum is really cross about it, ” he said. “People were discussing it on the bus too. Everybody is talking about it.”

It struck me that Prince Harry has attracted the very thing he most despises – press attention. He and Meghan have never been such hot news. They are bigger than Brexit, Iran and Prince Andrew’s friendship with a paedophile. That takes some doing and in my mind, it hasn’t happened by accident.

My spiritual mentor Marion constantly reminds me that what you think about, you create. ‘Be careful,’ she says. ‘if you keep thinking about what it is you don’t want, you will attract it into your life.’

She says that each of us creates our own reality. There is nobody else to blame. Not our parents, bosses, the rail network, bad luck, the press or whatever. The bucks stops with us.

Making a hash of it is part of the human condition and many learned psychotherapists have already proven that human beings recreate patterns that were laid down in childhood. A boy who had a domineering mother for example, may well go on to marry a bossy woman, while an abused child can often experience a lifetime of abusive relationships in adulthood.

Nobody is immune. We all act out behaviours that were hardwired into our brains as kids even when it is patently obvious that they no longer serve us.

It’s no surprise that Harry has recreated a ‘Princess Diana’ situation in 2020. All the elements are there – a vulnerable woman married into the royal family who is hounded by and ultimately destroyed by the press. Granted Harry and Meghan’s story continues, but I’ll wager that her destruction is the Prince’s greatest fear. Perhaps his unconscious desire is to save Meghan in a way that he couldn’t save his mother.

When I see the story in the news, I picture young Harry as a boy trailing behind his mother’s coffin looking hopelessly lost, for that is the part of him creating this drama. Meghan brings her own pain to the table, which is of course, why he chose her.

I urge you to show them some compassion because nobody would enjoy what they are going through right now. It’s patently obvious they are hurting badly and trust me, their good looks, riches and privilege will not ease the pain.

Marion would say it is all happening for a reason and that there is a lesson here for them. Perhaps they are doing us all a favour by demonstrating in technicolour, that what you obsess over, comes to pass.

I bore that in mind yesterday when I created another 2020 vision board when Marion did an online version of her workshop.

I am as guilty as Meghan and Harry, because I definitely think more about the things I don’t want than those I do. When I focus on trying to earn more money, I can’t stop thinking about my credit card debt or all the things I cannot afford. If I turn my attention to carving out a more fulfilling career, I tend to linger on the idea that it is going to be one long hard slog filled with early morning networking breakfasts and bad sausages.

My vision board is hanging on the wall of my office. There are no bad sausages to be seen. It is awash with pictures of remote locations, trees, minimalist interiors and spiritual retreats. There are words too – freedom, silence, love, abundance etc. It is topped by a pretty ballerina with arms outstretched in a perfect fifth position. If I occupy my mind with the delicious feelings that this board evokes, then I should be onto a winner – I’ll get back to you in 2021.

Interestingly, following a deep meditation, I asked my higher self what action I need to take immediately. The answer was to Marie Kondo my office just like I did my wardrobe at the start of 2019.

Initially, I was a bit annoyed. That didn’t sound very exciting. Where was the money? The laughs? But, I realised that my tidy wardrobes (they are STILL exceptionally neat) reflected the way I wanted my mind to be in 2019. Clear, uncluttered and calm. As it happens, that’s exactly the way my psyche headed, so it makes sense to do the same to my office, before I try and create a meaningful and abundant worklife. You never know, I might end up has Harry and Meghan’s new PR…


  1. When I do meditations where I “go within” and meet with my “lower” or “child” or “inner” self, and ask what she wants to tell me, it’s always “Just check in with me for 5 minutes every day.” So Not Exciting, I think. So That Can’t Be All, Can It? Then she says Hey, If You Can’t or Won’t Even Do That Simple Thing, You Are Not Ready for More Astounding Guidance. Get Down With the Basics!

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